I will not fuck any of you while you are a student or while I am employed at this university. I have a very loving and beautiful wife. I will not rule out sleeping with a few of you at some point in your lives. Things happen. I remember a colleague of mine once said, ‘I will never sleep with one of my students,’ but then his wife was horribly maimed in an auto accident and she lost the use of the lower part of her body. Ten weeks later my colleague confessed he had slept with every one of his students. I couldn’t help by laugh. You probably think I am a horrible person. I’m not great, though I do believe in honesty which is why I’m excited about the idea that some of us will make bad decisions together at some point in the future after my wife becomes a quadriplegic. I will not rule out any of you. I’ve never sucked a dick, but I came close in grad school with this guy on the archery team. Unfortunately, he thought it would be better if we only cuddled and then went our separate ways in the morning.