I haven’t talked to you in maybe fifteen years. I think the last time I saw you I waved and said, “Hey,” and you said, “Oh hi Mark.” Anyway, I want to share a financial tip with you. I need $50,000.

We played tennis once and then another time we were supposed to play tennis, but I cancelled late which was not appropriate tennis conduct. We never played tennis with each other again.

I don’t know if you remember, but we both live on planet earth. If I don’t raise $50,000 then a bad man is going to hurt all my childhood memories.

We never went to the same high school, but I think I remember seeing you yawn once. Can I have $50,000?

I think I saw you lying in a park near a pigeon. Maybe that wasn’t you.

I am stranded on the moon and I need $50,000 to get home for my dad’s birthday.

Its been probably twenty-five years since we played grand theft auto in your room when we were in high school.

I don’t know if you remember, but we once worked at the same pizza hut or something. Anyway, I was eating a piece of ricotta cheese today and thought you might be willing to give me $50,000?

You taught me how to slice bread. I need your help again.